The last 6 weeks have been a little bit of a rough ride for me dealing with this injury. My emotions would range from irritated to hopeful to depressed to optimistic to bitchy to determined to frustrated until finally I accepted that I have to deal with this injury head on. So it turns out that this groin/adductor issue that I have taken so much time off is actually a couple of different things. The most serious is a stress reaction of my pelvis. This means that it is not quite a stress fracture, but it is trying to be. The only cure for it is total rest. I also have a boatload of inflammation, tightness, and muscular imbalance in my core area causing all sorts of problems. And finally I have sports hernia (tears in my abdominal wall). When my doctor read my MRI results to me, my immediate reaction was to start crying, because it sounded like there was a lot going on in my pelvic region that I just wasn't expecting. But after thinking about all of my symptoms (pain while sneezing/unable to sit on saddle or run for even a minute/pain while sleeping and walking up steps) the diagnosis made total sense.
I am not really sure how this injury started. I tend to think it is because I got tired and sloppy. A typical day for me is a morning swim, work on my feet all day, bike, run, sleep. I think I just got exhausted and let my posture slip during the workday and came home and worked out on tired muscles with bad form. Plus I would fake my functional strength workouts, by not concentrating on using proper form. Strength training was a total afterthought, usually fit in between eating dinner, packing lunch, brushing my teeth, and showering. I definitely did not make core work/strength training a priority when I should have. Who knows if this would have happened anyways? But the one thing that I do know is that I need to figure out what to do now...
I went to ART therapy for the first 3 weeks of this injury, which usually helps with all of my soft tissue tightness, but it was not working for this. Then the past 3 weeks, I have been going to PT almost every day with deep tissue massage weekly and it still hasn't improved. My strength and mobility is great, but I just can't seem to get rid of this pain in my groin area. I plan to continue down the road of more PT, but I am afraid that the sports hernia could simply not heal and that scares the crap out of me. Surgery is another option at some point, but if I decide that surgery is the road that I need to take - I am scared that my pelvic bone issues might not heal all the way. I know I just need to have patience, but it is so much easier said than done.
This is not really the way I had envisioned my first pro season. I get pretty upset when I think of all of the freezing mornings that I woke up at 5a.m. to swim by myself, and all of the hours I put on the trainer after work with t-runs in the snow late at night. I have been looking forward to summer training for a long time, and now that it is here, it is driving me bananas to not be out there! I feel like I was on the road to a fun season, and I really didn't get anything out of all of those sacrifices. It honestly has been a struggle to stay positive sometimes, but I just have to remember that I can't always plan life, and I need to roll with the punches. In my heart, I do know that I will recover and be back out there, sometimes it is just a tough pill to swallow when you are going through it.
I am really trying to focus on the positives that I have in my life and keep an honest perspective of what is truly important. I have been spending lots of time with my family. I am grateful to have really good insurance in a time when many people do not. I know that my health will come around (even though I don't feel very healthy now). Finally I am incredibly grateful to have such wonderful support. I have Dr. Davenport that has been so helpful in helping me figure all of this out. Aimee, the absolute best PT that I can imagine. Coach Jesse, that has been a rock for me, keeping me positive even during my dark days of wanting to eat only brownies. And finally Jeremy - who I am honestly surprised that he has not asked for a divorce after all of my mood swings!!
Hopefully sooner than later, I will be out there enjoying what I love to do...Until then, I will be doing LOTS and LOTS of core work...and trying to stay sane!!!